Strange Times



I had expected post divorce life to be similar in some aspects to pre divorce life, especially when it came to the kids. Seems I was wrong. Hold the front page, Dad wrong!  It is only now hitting me that we are no longer a family, and that I am most definitely a peripheral player. Case in point – last Sunday was Little League day at Safeco Field, and kids in their outfits got to run the bases, (I think) and generally have fun.

My ex never even mentioned it to me. The only reason I know if it is because I’m on the email list for my sons’ team. She turned up to our daughters’ last game of the season in a Mariners’ jacket( She’s not even a fan) and never mentioned it at all. I probably wouldn’t have gone anyway, but it feels weird not to be part of the kids’ lives to the same extent as before.

On the other hand, my life is none of her business. I’ve had two very pleasant dates this week, one in Seattle and one elsewhere, and she can go to hell if she doesn’t like it. I know she’s seeing someone, and probably was before I moved out ( funny, but almost overnight the time she needed to go to Costco more than doubled).

I’ve pretty much stopped using the shared calendar we have online, partly because I keep forgetting about it, and partly because I don’t see why she should know what I’m doing. Should I have put “Hot date” in the calendar for Tuesday and Thursday this week? What would it have achieved?

It’s just strange not to know what the kids are up to on an ongoing basis, to not know about playdates, sleepovers, etc. I’m enjoying very much being single again, but it’s a bit of an adjustment getting used to not knowing what is going on. Still, as the old saying goes, “If you can’t take a joke, you shouldn’t have joined”.


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