WE CAN WORK IT OUT. 04/20/13
You would think that there would always be a lot of conflict in a divorce, where you to believe the popular image portrayed in the media. But no, we are able to work things out pretty well. For example, consider the $65k increase in the value of the house. We had considered sitting down and working through it, but in the end we spent about 45 seconds during our counselling session coming to a reasonable agreement. I won’t bore you with the formula, but it was a pretty agreeable arrangement. She’s not keen on paying interest on the unpaid portion, but we’ll work out a reasonable rate, as I’m not prepared to take a hit just for her sake.
We’ve also been able to stay reasonable when it comes to the kids. I’m not selfish enough to stop the kids from doing something just to make my life easier, but STBX has not accepted any invitations on their behalf without checking with me first. I think that most people are unsure or uncomfortable about asking whom they should ask regarding a sleepover or playdate, and as of writing, this arrangement has worked out pretty well.
I hope we can keep this situation going after the end of the divorce, as I really don’t want the kids to miss out on spending time with their friends, and I’m pretty sure it will get easier once more people get to know our schedule and are more comfortable with the situation. In fact, once the money is sorted out, the kids will be the only issue that needs adjustment on either of our parts, and as they get older, it will get easier to arrange schedule changes.
Not that things are ideal, you understand. For instance, I had hoped we would be finished with the whole procedure by now and there are a few niggling details regarding personal items to finalise, but on the whole, it’s going pretty well.
notesfromasingledad 